#WHYS IT SO SAD
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and how long will it take? before you start to hate yourself? and go straight to the arms of someone else? and i'll just wait till those arms belong to me and i'm not saying that you love me i'm not saying anything..
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me? crying over a stupid fucking minecraft smp dangonrompa au? thats crazy.
#smpronpa#WHYS IT SO SAD#Also it is 12 45 am#why am i reading this#danomrompa made me have nightmares#when i watched it#and now#im reading something#that objectivley is making me feel worse#because oh my god#it is horrifying#cause like#what if that happens?#what do you do in that situation?
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No one has painted me in over 400 years.
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Did you know it’s legal in the USA for mattress companies to put fiberglass in their mattresses? They don’t even have to label them! So if you wanna commission me so I can buy a new bed I won’t stop you
#deadass might never get top surgery at this rate#I feel so defeated#I just got done decorating my room and now I gotta gut it :(#I know my comics are goofy but like I’m genuinely really sad#like I just wanna give up WHY TF WOULD THEY PUT FIBERGLASS IN MATTRESES
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the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.
when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."
but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.
now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.
the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.
but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."
the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.
but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?
because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!
and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.
#spilled ink#writeblr#warm up#this is an incredibly difficult idea to express#but i basically keep watching the same timelooped interaction:#someone makes tradwife content where she's like ''i think it's SO sad when ppl don't have kids EW''#and then the response is ''... go fuck yourself? i think ur life is miserable and bad ?"#and instead of being like ''oh we are all under capitalism huh''#the response is like ''you CANT say that. she made a CHOICE. she is ALLOWED to have KIDS and be HAPPY#unlike YOU who is UNHAPPY bc you don't have KIDS.''#like .... these are people who will throw the first stone. and then when you lob one back#they ask why you're so violent. they tell you that you're a bad activist.#and you're like. PARDON????? you implied being a woman meant i need to submit to my husband???#and they're like - well it's just my belief. so what if i'm invalidating your entire identity.
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The day FNAF Charlie Emily was shut out..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#william afton#charlie emily#charlotte emily#fnaf 2#fnaf pizzaria simulator#William Afton you deserve nothing good in this world#this is why you got sent to super hell#Charlie’s whole story makes me so sad#not only was she ignored by her own father#locked out of thr pizzeria during a rainstorm#but her fathers friend .. someone she probably trusted#instead of helping her out of the rain#bringing her home or helping her back inside#betrays her inherent trust in him#and leaves her out to rot#only being given a chance through the security puppet coming to her#I’m surprised she isn’t more pissed while being the puppet#she deserved so much more#finally did a full design for her too in the games..#I actually really like how this comic turned out#even if it makes me sad
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the nuzzling in oh i’m sick somebody kill them (affectionately)
#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane season two#viktor arcane#jayce talis#jayce arcane#jayvik#why are gay people so tragic#i hate them (affectionate)#this is so joever#gay ppl and their situationships#sad day for gay ppl#i hate gay people#gay jesus
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why did he do that to me? part 2 of this :3
#transformers one#transformers#bumblebee#b 127#elita one#megatron#i mean um at least shes hugging him now#yayyyy!#dee and bee being friends in this iteration makes it so much sadder#"why did you do this to me#tfone bee specifcally losing his voice feels so much more devastating 😭#they gave him such a sad backstory for comedic effect but its just sad
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if we could stay connected, just like this
#ok last orbit niigo post im emubrained again and also i miss leoneed#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#mizuki5 spoilers#proseka#mizuki akiyama#mizu5#nightcord at 25:00#hurray !#meltdown released an amazing translation of the event so i read it and had my final cathartic transgender cry about it#and now i have ~4 assignments due on friday so i have to stop drawing mizuki. sad.#i recommend everyone watch meltdown's translation#please. its very good and better than the mtls floating around#i Get why people wanted to see it translated asap like i Get it i didnt understand half of the wordplay or kanji but like . wah#its so crazy how this event breached containment n how many people are rooting for mizuki even tho they dont play the game so i just#think its a shame that the translation everyones reading isnt really accurate/lacks the nuances.. Ok sorrynits a good event.#ive just been thinking abiut that for a few days and i love talking in tags. Adios#real Orbit heads will know this is an Heartorbit reference (that tarot card sketch i did almost 2 years ago and said i would finish)#(i havent finished shit)
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charm stat at debonair ‼️‼️
#WOW WHO WOULD HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT THEYD BE MY FAVORITES. THIS TOTALLY WASNT EXPECTED. NOT AT ALL.#i have lots of persona art its just uncolored dw#doing the shujin trio next i miss them so bad☹️☹️ also i need pegoryu content to stay sane and alive#anyway they're like. actually fucking insane 💀💀💀💀#like lawlight level toxic yaoi its so absurd#like i was like damn soukoku is intense WHO ARE THESE FREAKS#WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY LIKE THIS.#ACTUALLY FUCKING INSANE. LIKE EXTREMELY MENTAL AND SICK IN THE HEAD.#AKECHI IS A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH#god they actually make me so fucking AUAUAUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH#i NEED to finish royal shidos palace GUTTED ME#they were initially so funny to me bc right off the bat you can tell how much of a FREAK akechi is just paraphrasing hegel#and being so ferevently obsessed with ren its like bro why is this guy straightup dickriding us for telling him we like our eggs well done#ANYWAY their dynamic always felt so sad to me bc it was akechi just desperately clawing for what ren had the entire time ☹️#and the more he realized how worthless he was in comparison the more mentally unhinged he became until he actually broke#me when the trope is “the love was there but it wasn't enough to save them” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 (FUCKING DEVASTATING)#ermmm anyway yea they're neat. ig#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#goro akechi#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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buckle up lads we're going BACK INTO THE BOOK
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(the origin of halloween huh) (oooh)#why yes i did wake up way too early to watch the stream and will have no memory of drawing this later#anyway THE MAGIC BOOK IS BACK TO EAT US ONCE AGAIN!!!!#this does make things make a lot more sense if it doesn't have to. y'know. actually take place in the established world#like how jack and sally are apparently just gonna be THERE as themselves WHY NOT#i'm certainly not complaining mind you#scully looks like he's gonna be super adorable and i love him already#spooky scary skeleman who just goes :O a lot and is excited for halloween#he seems like he might actually be more of a fusion of jack and sally? or maybe i'm just reading too much into it#still getting jazzy vibes off of him though. is not scully j graves an incredible jazz musician name.#does this open up the possibility that the last time we went into the book there was a sexy anime boy stitch just offscreen the whole time#...maybe some things are best left uncontemplated#god everyone in this event looks fantastic i'm so glad i saved up some keys after all#a little sad that there's no lilia but you know what the fact that a halloweentown malleus exists is still pretty dang good#and sebek's hat is SO tall#the biggest hat for the loudest boy#i hope oogie is here too i need him and jamil to meet#i need jamil to be faced with a guy who's just a bunch of bugs standing on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat#i am not coherent right now i just needed to get this out before i go pass out again
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My tragic lovelies… just them 💔
#I LOVE THEM SO MUCH#WHY ARE THEY SO SAD#SOBBING#puella magi madoka magica#madoka kaname#homura akemi#madoka magica#madohomu#homumado#madoka magica fanart#madoka magica rebellion#madoka magica homura#madoka fanart#devil homura#digital illustration#emi art#artwork#fanart#character art
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Alcohol can't kill Logan, but it can affect him. Wade can't kill Logan, but he can—oh.
#I MADE MYSELF SAD AGAIN HELP#there’s SOMETHING about this parallel#ughhhh#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#Deadpool 3#ryan reynolds#hugh jackman#logan howlett#wade wilson#HUGH WHY DO YOU MAKE LOGAN LOOK SO SOFT WHILE LOOKING AT WADE#WILL I EVER BE NORMAL ABOUT THEM??!#they’re in love bye#deadpool wolverine#deadpool x wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool vs wolverine#my gifs#marvel#mcu
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She will (and he'll let her)
#zutara#atla#zuko#avatar the last airbender#katara#atla fanart#prince zuko#zutara au#atla art#zutara fanart#zutara art#zuko x katara#katara x zuko#atla zuko#katara art#katara fanart#katara of the southern water tribe#the western air temple#This was inspired by THAT Trigun Stampede scene (if you're a Vashwood fan you'll know which one)#The “I'll kill you” *heart eyes* dynamic is SO Western-Air-Temple-ZK coded it's insane#Also Zuko loves girls who can kick his ass and that's canon. Like. The fact that they can and WILL plummet him to the ground is a big yes#I just know it#And yeah my boy was pretty crestfallen during that scene (too sad and defeated for someone who didn't have *ahem* at least a crush on her)#(In my very much not humble opinion)#But some (hidden) part of him was like “kissherkissherkissher” and you cannot convince me otherwise#I think about his dorky hopeful smile when he saw her literally all the time#And then the kicked turtleduck face that screamed “no smooches? 🥺”#Like what's up with that Zuko?#Why would you keep silent because you know you deserve this treatment for her but that didn't stop you from wishing otherwise?#Just WHY
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“When I first heard it, from a dog trainer who knew her behavioral science, it was a stunning moment. I remember where I was standing, what block of Brooklyn’s streets. It was like holding a piece of polished obsidian in the hand, feeling its weight and irreducibility. And its fathomless blackness. Punishment is reinforcing to the punisher. Of course. It fit the science, and it also fit the hidden memories stored in a deeply buried, rusty lockbox inside me. The people who walked down the street arbitrarily compressing their dogs’ tracheas, to which the poor beasts could only submit in uncomprehending misery; the parents who slapped their crying toddlers for the crime of being tired or hungry: These were not aberrantly malevolent villains. They were not doing what they did because they thought it was right, or even because it worked very well. They were simply caught in the same feedback loop in which all behavior is made. Their spasms of delivering small torments relieved their frustration and gave the impression of momentum toward a solution. Most potently, it immediately stopped the behavior. No matter that the effect probably won’t last: the reinforcer—the silence or the cessation of the annoyance—was exquisitely timed. Now. Boy does that feel good.”
— Melissa Holbrook Pierson, The Secret History of Kindness (2015)
#dog books#this chapter was very sad reading#when you become aware of punishment#and its use and its prevalence#it's hard not to despair#again this is why positive reinforcement feels like absolution#maybe now my eyes are open I can make up for what I did#what I did because it's what everyone does#because it's more acceptable to punish than to do anything else#I've been having so many thoughts about punishment and society and justice#this book was very validating#another great validating moment in my jumbled thoughts#was listening to the You're Wrong About episode on justice#with Amanda Knox#it helped to ease the despair a little
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PHAETHON
#zzz#zenless zone zero#wise#belle#phaethon#*mgif#i think the wise gif was recorded without the color filter on so thats why it looks more saturated??#but i spent like 5 hours just recording both of them because the files kept disappearing#and i cant be bothered to do that all over again#which makes me sad bcs i wanted these to match so bad but i dont have the energy anymore</3#fellow ccs#do you guys record with obs or another recorder#because mine can only go up to 1080p#and i know some can go up to 2k
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